"Resolution: Time to JUMP."


A few days ago, Sunday morning to be exact, a new motivation hit me. Perhaps it was a renewed sense of vigor, maybe it was just a realization, I really don't know. But, whatever it was, it manifested itself as an invigorating motivator -- a motivator to try something new on a number of fronts.

What I mean by this is, my life is at a standstill right now, and there are things I've grown accustomed to, and have chosen to live with. I've forced myself to be comfortable in life where I am right now, but I think I staying where I am will wear me down and break my spirit. I am already feeling that breakdown increasing. I can't let it win. Fighting the breakdown will be a major challenge, but I really don't want to remain at a standstill forever.

I've been thinking lately, maybe this status I am in in life right now is God's way of saying, "Jon, get out there, and JUMP! To help you do so, I'm going to give you a little nudge.... You need work on taking risks. Until you step outside your box of familiarity, and take those major risks, success will come at a slow plodding pace. The incentive is there.... just JUMP. I have great things in store for you, I will be there beside you through it all, but I need you to learn to JUMP first. Then, I will show you where I want you to go."

Part of me really doesn't want to jump. I fear the unknown out there. That's probably why I have stayed relatively close to my box of familiarity. I guess I just have to work on that trust factor and just jump.... fear and all. They say, "the only way to overcome your fears, is to face them head on." I guess that's what I am going to have to do.

So, this week has already been the begining of that. An art career seems outside of my grasp. Ok, mabe it's time to pull my acting passion off the back burner and run more actively with that instead. I've already made contacts for some new professional headshots. I'm starting to look at more auditions. I'm renewing that passion for the stage, the screen, and all of that adrenaline rush that an actor craves. I've gotta jump.... what better way to do it!

Ok, so... what about this job at Barnes and Noble that I am growing to dislike more and more each day? What becomes of it. I want to just rebel and quit, however logic says, 'Stay strong. Endure it. Leaving now, with no other prospects, would be foolish. You would lose your measly source of income.'.... Ok... "Lord, give me the strength to endure."....

.... But I am making very serious preparations to leave that job. However, while I am still there, I am adopting a more opinionated approach. I will make my concerns known to my supervisors. I will play hardball. I've been lining their pockets at my expense, time to turn the tables a bit.... tactfully of course. ... [grin].

It seems Milwaukee, though my hometown ( technically, though, I did spend half my childhood up in Minneapolis, MN), is not going to be my residence forever. I've been giving serious thought lately to considering a move to either Chicago (though not my favorite city), or the major move to California. I need a change in life. I need to jump. A change of scenery may have to enter the picture sooner than I though. Honestly, I haven't made any plans yet, but, considering them is the first step.

So, my thoughts have once again filled with very serious concerns. My life is at a standstill.... I just need to cast off my box of familiarity, and JUMP. ... Challenge only makes a person stronger right? My biggest fear in life IS that challenge. ...

..."Lord, teach me to trust you more. Remind me that when I DO jump.... you are there to cushion the fall."

Have a blessed Wednesday, and by all means, feel free to stay tuned here, as I make that jump. This time I must. To remain standing still would be the death of me.

Until next time,

Your blogging friend,
-Jon

posted by Jon at 2:10 PM  I   I  0 comments