"The Obituary of a Dead Computer"

"Jon1", personal computer to Jon Baas, died today. It was 4 years old.

Born sometime in late 2002 in Minneapolis, Minnesota, "Jon1" served Jon Baas faithfully as his primary desktop computer. It had specialized training in artistic design software, had a propensity for creative simulation games, and loved to play musical MP3 files. Cause of death was a heart attack, brought on by massive electrical shock.

Earlier in the evening today (July 11, 2007), a transformer box blew outside Jon Baas' apartment. As a result, all electricity to the neighborhood was suddenly lost. Less than an hour later, as the local power company restored the grid, Jon went to wake up his computer. Almost immediately, he was greeted by sparks, sputtering gasps, and the smell of burned microchips. "Jon1" had blown it's power supply. It's heart had stopped.

Thankfully, all was not lost. Almost at once, Jon and his technically savvy roommate, Scott, went to work conducting surgery on the lifeless computer. Obtaining the body (CPU) of one of the other many functioning computers in Jon's apartment, the two men successfully removed and transplanted part of "Jon1"'s undamaged brain (the hard-drive) into it's new case. Surgery took a few hours, but was ultimately a success.

"Jon1" was preceded in death by it's predecessor -- Jon Baas' first computer -- which served the young artist faithfully throughout most of his college years. That first computer died on New Years Day 2003, due to sudden brain failure (motherboard).

"Jon1" now lives on in a new (and technically upgraded) body as computer "Jon2".

"Jon2" is survived by it's half-siblings -- the other many functioning computers in Jon Baas' apartment -- including the newest addition to the the family, Scott's top-of-the-line laptop.

Funeral arrangements for "Jon1" have been entrusted to Scott. However, there will be no visitation, as "Jon1"'s body has been donated to science. It's still-usable parts are for sale on Ebay.

-Jon
posted by Jon at 11:42 PM  I   I  0 comments